How To Be F*cking Awesome

“If you ever want to get anywhere in life, you’ve gotta start getting a little selfish”

If you plan on being successful and living life according to your own terms, then you have to be self-centered to a certain extent. You need to take care of yourself - if you are not healthy or mentally sound, you can’t successfully pursue your dreams.

As a child, you were probably taught to be selfless, to follow orders, and to make sacrifices for others. But the truth is, if you decide to live your life according to the expectations of others, you will never really own your life or get to your desired destination. Besides, you can’t give others what you don’t have. This means that you need to focus on yourself so that you can improve your life and in turn, improve the lives of those around you. 

Growing a business or attaining higher ranks at your workplace requires a lot of work. Of course, you can only work efficiently and be productive if you learn to be selfish with your time. Time is invaluable and if you spend it all trying to solve other people’s problems, you will likely remain stagnant yourself.

“Well, when you truly become shameless, you reach a new height of freedom – the freedom of not giving two hoots what people think about you. And that’s liberating, to say the least."

Most times, you limit yourself from some of the things you would have loved to do because of shame. Pride and ego can actually fuck you up, so the sooner you get rid of them, the better your life would be. For example, imagine you loved a girl but didn’t tell her out of fear, although she had been crushing on you all her life. You would have missed out on an opportunity to love and be loved in return.

Being shameless is liberating as you will reach a new height of freedom - the freedom to do what you want when you want, and how you want it without the fear of being judged. You will stop living your life by conforming to society or the opinions of others.

Now, being shameless is not about doing things that embarrass you and your loved ones. It means being bold enough to take whatever step that can help you achieve your dreams. This could include learning a new skill, starting a new business, protecting your relationships, and even taking care of yourself.

“And so for you, my friend, embracing your unique self, warts and all, is the single most beneficial thing you can do if you want to kick balls in life.”

Being weird is not really a bad thing. It means you are unique, and you should embrace your uniqueness! After all, most unique things are valuable and limited. This explains why antiques, collectibles, and rare paintings are expensive. They’re one of a kind, and so are you.

It is important for you to take time to identify the things that make you unique so you can use them to your advantage. Some of our seemingly weird features or qualities are strengths you can leverage once you identify them. For example, instead of feeling weird for being extremely tall, you can instead leverage that aspect and become an amazing supermodel. 

Also, as a weirdo, you will be true to yourself by always showing people who you really are instead of trying to be what they think you are.

“We aren’t honest with ourselves. And hence, when we have our legs hanging in the grave, we realize, ‘Shit, I lied to myself my whole life.”

Honesty may be underestimated but it’s actually a great virtue. It’s one of those things that can take you far in life. When you are brutally honest with yourself, you learn to tell yourself the truth. Of course, you can only have an impact on society if you are truthful enough to accept your weaknesses and work on them to become a better version of yourself. 

Being brutally truthful often goes beyond your own self. It includes others or the society at large. For example, a common piece of advice is to follow your passion, but what if your passion cannot help you earn a living? You will have to be honest to yourself and admit that you will not get anywhere by merely following your passions. You could instead consider learning new skills or improving old skills that are in high demand in the job market.

You may also be oblivious to some truths about yourself. This is where your close friends and family can help, as they can provide a more objective view.

“It’s funny how we stop learning and making ourselves more and more valuable as soon as we hear that last bell ringing in the school hallways.”

In this ever-competitive world, it is imperative for you to make yourself valuable to society at all times. This means you should invest your time, energy, and resources in learning new things that can add value to your life as well as your society or community.

You may already have a certain level of formal education, but that alone can’t take you that far. Simply put, formal education is never enough. You may want to consider investing in totally new skills or honing your existing skills so that you can always have an edge over others.

For example, you could have been trained as a journalist, but learning new skills in video editing, photo editing, or digital marketing can make you more versatile.

There are many ways of learning new skills, including buying and reading books, attending seminars, and studying online courses. All you need to do is dedicate yourself to this.

“The people who have the most friends, a huge network, or own successful businesses are in fact extremely interesting’’.

When it comes to running a business, your personality is very important. You should focus on developing the type of personality that others find interesting. The truth is, with a warm personality you can easily pull huge crowds. This translates to you selling more of your products and services and getting more returns on your investment.

You may not be born interesting, but you can learn how to make others find you interesting. This doesn’t mean you should try to be someone else. Instead, you could educate yourself on a wide variety of issues, so you can contribute effortlessly in almost all discussions.

That said, being interesting works hand in hand with being interested in others. You may not love everybody, but you can learn to listen more to others and divert your discussions into topics they find interesting. You will have to be open-minded to see things from the lenses of others, instead of always trying to impose your beliefs, thoughts, and values on others.

“There’s no better motivation than a will to show someone who thought you were scum that actually, you’re an awesome, successful machine."

One of the facts about life is that it’s impossible for everyone to love you no matter how awesome you are. Some people may resent you because of your success, ambitions, or how well you carry yourself. Learn to accept this reality but do not behave vengefully about it. Instead, consider some of those insults and negative comments about you as challenges and work hard to prove your ‘haters’ wrong.

You will also experience others discouraging you from doing the things you have always wanted to do. They will always give you reasons why can’t do this or that. Learn to pay no attention to this group of people, but instead, lay down the right strategies to prove them wrong.

The idea of being spiteful is not to be mean towards people who don’t like you, but rather to not let the opinions of others define or limit you. Use criticisms to improve yourself. Remember, the best motivation is the desire to prove others wrong by achieving success.

“You can’t get to this stage (honestly) without being super productive with your time. Otherwise, you’ll burn out, lose motivation, give up and head back to the J.O.B with your tail between your legs.”

The importance of being productive can never be overemphasized. You may have other positive traits, but are these enough to take you to a place of awesomeness? The answer is certainly a big no.

You can only achieve a certain level of success if you are productive with your time. Being productive is all about disciplining yourself and working hard by doing the right thing at the right time and at the right places. If you fail to find out ways to be super productive, you will always find yourself exercising a ton of effort and achieving very little in return. This will likely cause you to lose motivation and focus. You may even feel like giving up on your dreams.

You will need to discipline yourself, work hard, and make short- and long-term plans. Above all, you have to be smart enough to identify all potential opportunities as you continue climbing the ladder of success.

“It’s important to surround yourself with like-minded people – those who are not only on the same journey as you but some who are further along the line or maybe slightly behind you.”

The power of association is very crucial to how far you can go in life. Learn to associate with the right people, such as those who think like you or who are already where you would want to be in the future. Focus on filling your social circle with ambitious people and go-getters who are ready to take risks to become successful. The key is to spend your time with people who have the same values, ambitions, and goals as you.

One bitter fact about life is that as you evolve and grow bigger, you will start to lose some people you had always respected. This is because some of them can feel threatened about your growth and start acting in ways that are no longer pleasing to you. Consider such seemingly acts of betrayal to be part of your growth process. Don’t let it take a toll on your mental health and levels of productivity. 

Be intentional about building valuable and real relationships as you journey to higher heights. The people you stand by and support today will also support you whenever you are faced with challenges.

“It’s being consistent, working hard, and being relentless as fuck to make your dreams a reality”.

If you really desire success, then you have to be passionate and work consistently to get to your destination. You may have read or heard many things about how to make fast money, but the truth is, nothing happens overnight and you can never really be successful without putting in hours of work. The most successful people in this world didn’t just get to their levels by chance. They actually worked hard to be where they are today. 

You may think you are bound to succeed because you are intelligent and blessed with many talents. Well, that’s simply not true. You will need to invest your time and effort, and also discipline yourself to live a certain way. It’s only through these inputs that you can stay consistent in whatever you do.

Being consistent goes hand-in-hand with identifying opportunities and taking calculated risks. However, it’s also important to identify the point where you need to cut back or let go for a period of time. This doesn’t mean you are giving up on your dreams, it only means you want to re-strategize so you can have better outcomes.

“Often people forget the efforts of individuals who actually helped them get to where they are. They become egotistical and start to believe that they are a one-man-band, which rarely is the case”

Life can sometimes be unpredictable. So, it’s important to be nice and treat people fairly on your way to the top. Human relationships are crucial to your success. When you have the right people in your circle, you can easily achieve your dreams.

Once you get to the top, always remember the efforts and sacrifices others made to push you to that level. You may become arrogant and egoistic, thinking you are a one-man band, but that will not lead you anywhere. Nothing is permanent and you may come across some of those people you disrespected or disregarded again.

You may truly be a nice person, but if you can’t discipline yourself well and control your emotions, you will end up appearing arrogant and ungrateful to others. The trick here is to learn to be considerate of others. For example, instead of replying rudely to an impossible request, you may want to give it time to figure out what is really happening. Keep in mind that people can be difficult when they are going through challenges such as health scares and divorce, so do your best to be understanding of others.