Learn to negotiate in your professional life.

As a woman, if you were to negotiate anything at work—be it your starting salary at a new job, a promotion, etc.—you would most likely be met with more resistance than if a man were to negotiate the same thing in the same way. So, don’t negotiate like a man. Negotiate like a woman instead, and you will have a higher chance of getting what you want.

1. Come across as being nice, concerned with others, and “appropriately” female.
   If you were to take an instrumental approach and say, “This is what I want and deserve,” you would most likely be denied. Instead, when negotiating for a higher starting salary, for example, begin by explaining that you know women often get paid less than men, so you are going to negotiate rather than accept the original offer.

2. Substitute “I” with “we” wherever you can.
   For example, use, “We had a great year,” not, “I had a great year.” In the eyes of the listener, you are now connected to a group and aren’t just out for yourself—you’re out negotiating for all women.

3. You must also justify your request.
   You can do this by suggesting that someone more senior encouraged the negotiation (e.g., “My manager suggested I talk with you about my compensation”) or by citing industry standards (e.g., “I understand that jobs that involve this level of responsibility are compensated in this range”).

4. Be relentlessly pleasant.
   Smile frequently, express appreciation and concern, invoke common interests, emphasize larger goals, and always, always approach the negotiation as if you are trying to solve a problem.